"Wave 2's in thirty minutes," Rina repeated casually.
Like she was announcing a tea break.
I was lying on the grass, bleeding from at least four places, my sword looked like a cracked breadstick, and my Lag Clone was still trying to high-five a dead goblin three seconds too late.
"Can I uninstall reality?" I croaked.
Rina chuckled and offered me a flask of weird glowing soup. "Drink. You'll live."
[Item Used: Bunny Root Soup]
[HP Restored: +12 | Current HP: 13/17]
[Status Effect Removed: 'Mild Goblin Trauma']
Nice. My organs stopped vibrating.
---
I opened my system panel to check on the spoils.
Name: Yuto Kurogane
Race: ???
Level: 3
Title: Error404, Airborne Idiot
HP: 13/17
MP: 0/?
Strength: 6 | Agility: 5 | Intelligence: 7
Skills:
- Glitch: Random Buff (10s)
- Packet Skip (1x/day)
- Sound Lag
- Lag Clone (Lv2)
Inventory:
- Rusty Sword (Cracked)
- Glitch Token x2
Lag Clone leveled up too. Cool!
[Lag Clone Lv2: Clone now mimics 2 actions instead of 1. Still delayed. Still confusing.]
Me: "Time to cause even more chaos!"
---
Suddenly, my system flickered.
Like, literally glitched.
[WARNING: Glitch Token Unstable. Do you wish to consume?]
"…That's new."
"Why not?" I whispered. "When in glitch, go full switch."
I tapped yes.
---
[System Update: You've unlocked a new Passive Skill!]
[Skill Unlocked: "Rollback"]
Once per day, rewind last 5 seconds of combat. May or may not work properly.
Me: "So I just got a glitched save-state button?"
Rina: "Are you talking to yourself again?"
Me: "No. I'm talking to the narrator."
Rina blinked. "...What?"
"Never mind."
---
[ALERT: Wave 2 Approaching!]
Detected: 3 Goblin Grunts, 1 Goblin Spearthrower, 1 Goblin Captain (Lv. 7 Boss)]
Me: "Of course there's a boss now. This wouldn't be a tutorial without one."
Rina: "You ready?"
I nodded, even though I wasn't.
"Let's glitch this guy into next Tuesday."
---
5 Minutes Later – Village Gates
We stood behind a row of barrels, villagers trembling behind us. My sword was duct-taped. Not metaphorically—literally held together with twine and hope.
Then the Goblin Captain emerged.
It was BIG.
It had armor made of bones.
It had a glowing red eye.
And worst of all… it looked smart.
"Definitely not a tutorial boss," I muttered.
---
The fight started with chaos.
Spearthrower launched a projectile. I dodged—barely.
I activated Glitch Buff.
[Buff Activated: Mirror Mode]
All your controls are reversed for 10 seconds.
Me: "OH COME ON—"
I swung left. It went right. I ducked. I jumped. I tried to retreat and instead ran directly at the Goblin Captain.
---
WHACK.
I flew backward into a barrel.
HP -5.
Rina was fending off two grunts with scary elegance. "Little help!?"
"Working on it!" I stood up, activated Lag Clone, and charged again.
My attack missed—again—but my clone landed two hits three seconds later.
[Goblin Grunt Defeated]
Then the Captain came at me with a bone axe.
I screamed. He swung.
And I hit Rollback.
---
The world rewound 5 seconds.
I saw myself charging.
The Goblin Captain hadn't swung yet.
"Oh baby. It works."
This time, I sidestepped just before the swing.
Missed!
I countered with a desperate stab—
[Critical Hit – 22 Damage]
The Captain reeled.
Rina landed a spinning kick on its back.
Together, we clashed swords and claws and chaos for 20 more seconds.
Finally—
[Goblin Captain Defeated!]
[Wave 2 Cleared!]
[+180 EXP | Level Up → Level 5]
[New Title Earned: "Lag Warrior"]
I collapsed again, panting, soaked in sweat and goblin bits.
---
Rina offered a hand, grinning. "Told you you're not half bad."
"I think I'm 51% bad and the rest is just luck and bugs."
She laughed.
Behind us, villagers cheered. Kids called me "Hero" (which was terrifying). Even Borin gave me a respectful nod.
I opened my status again.
---
Name: Yuto Kurogane
Race: ???
Level: 5
Title: Error404, Airborne Idiot, Lag Warrior
HP: 11/21
MP: 0/?
Strength: 8 | Agility: 6 | Intelligence: 8
Skills:
- Glitch: Random Buff (10s)
- Packet Skip (1x/day)
- Sound Lag
- Lag Clone (Lv2)
- Rollback (1x/day)
Inventory:
- Broken Rusty Sword
- Glitch Token x1
---
I stared at the glitching token in my hand.
"I think I'm getting stronger…"
Then the system chimed.
[Main Quest Unlocked: Discover Your Race]
[Hint: You're not supposed to exist.]
Me: "I'm sorry—WHAT?"
---
To be continued...