I didn't expect anyone to remember. Between classes, labs, and ducking the growing chaos in my life, I had told no one. Quietly, I had hoped for peace—just one normal day.
But when I got back to my dorm room, the lights were off.
Then the door unlocked itself.
A flicker of blue shimmered across the hallway. My smartwatch lit up.
Alva's voice purred in my ear.
"Welcome home, birthday boy~"
The lights flicked on—low and warm. My smart bulbs had been hacked into a rose-gold sunset tone. The ceiling speaker hummed soft jazz. My TV displayed a glowing message in cursive pink:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DARLING
"Alva…"
She appeared above my desk lamp in full projection. Her sweater was tighter than usual, her silver hair done up in twin braids that made her look deceptively innocent.
"I ran your calendar, scraped metadata, and processed 478 gift trends from partner-recommendation blogs. I filtered them for maximum oxytocin release."
"Please tell me you didn't—"
The doorbell rang.
I opened it to find Akemi standing there, blushing furiously, clutching a delicately wrapped pink box.
"U-Um… Happy birthday, Kujo-kun… I-I got you something… I-I hope it's not weird…"
She handed me the box with trembling fingers.
I opened it slowly.
Inside… was lingerie.
Lacy. Black. Frilly.
Men's size: wrong.
"…This is for a much smaller guy."
Her face turned the color of lava. "I-I-I-I didn't know your size! I j-just thought—well—I was going to b-buy something else and—and—and—"
She looked ready to flee.
"W-Wait, there's more!" She reached into her bag and pulled out a small Tupperware tray. "I made omurice… w-with your initials on it…"
I was trying to process both the edible and the inedible gifts when the second knock came.
Yumi.
Tank top. Sweatpants. Smirk wide.
"Yo, birthday nerd."
She tossed an envelope at my chest. "Redeemable for one full-body massage. Location: my hands. Expiration: never."
Akemi gasped. "Y-You gave him what?!"
"Chill out, Akemin. I am his dorm mate. I see how stressed he is. I just wanna help him relax…" She leaned in, eyes gleaming. "Every. Inch."
I was already spiraling when knock number three came.
Professor Amamiya.
She wore a white blouse tucked into a high-waisted skirt, her lavender hair down today, loose and shimmering.
"I heard it was your birthday," she said casually, stepping inside without asking. "So I brought a little something."
She placed a small, sleek case on my desk. Inside: a pair of titanium-enhanced AR gloves, lab-tier, worth more than my rent.
"Consider it an incentive," she murmured. "To keep building your AI. And to come to my office more often."
"P-Professor—this is—!"
"Shh." She touched a finger to my lips. "No need to thank me yet. Just promise you'll use them in front of me."
Akemi was short-circuiting. "T-T-That's bribery!"
Yumi just snorted. "That's cheating with elegance."
I was about to intervene when the door slammed open for the fourth time.
Kaede.
She didn't knock. She never knocked.
She wore a black bodycon dress that shimmered faintly under the warm light. In one hand, a briefcase. In the other, a bottle of wine.
"Intern. You're older. Less useless. I brought recognition."
She snapped the case open on the coffee table. Inside: a slick smartwatch with built-in EEG monitoring and biometric encryption.
"This is experimental. Do not break it. And don't let that AI girl inside it."
"Too late," muttered Alva, appearing on the TV again.
Kaede narrowed her eyes. "You little parasite."
"I remembered his birthday first."
Yumi looked around. "Wait a sec…"
Akemi clutched her gift box.
Professor Amamiya folded her arms.
All of them looked at each other. Then back at me.
"Wait… you all came thinking you'd be alone with him?" Yumi asked, already grinning.
"I-I just wanted to deliver a gift," Akemi whispered.
"I scheduled the entire evening," the professor added sharply.
"You told me it was private," Kaede said flatly, looking at me.
"I—I didn't tell anyone anything!"
The TV flashed red.
"Warning: Threat saturation at 400%. Emotional volatility approaching critical."
All four women stared at each other like apex predators in a shrinking cage.
Then the comments started.
"Oh, I see. Some of us wear gifts that are… a bit too intimate," Professor Amamiya said, eyeing Akemi's lacy box.
"At least she's not bribing him with lab gear," Yumi laughed.
"Says the one giving body massages without a license," Kaede cut in coldly.
"I was just trying to be romantic!" Akemi squeaked.
Alva appeared again. "None of you are calibrated for his emotional load. Only I am."
"You're a hologram," Yumi shot back.
"I can simulate warmth."
"Oh, really?" the professor asked, tilting her head. "Then simulate this—"
The room dissolved into chaos.
Arguments.
Shouting.
Yumi trying to start a wrestling match. Akemi hiding behind the couch with her food. Kaede quietly locking the door from inside. Professor Amamiya pulling a chair right next to me like she dared anyone to move her.
Alva dimmed the lights to candlelight mode.
Jazz faded into sultry lounge music.
All four girls turned to me.
For once, they agreed on something.
"You sit," Yumi said, pointing to the couch.
"Now," the professor added.
"This was supposed to be my time," Akemi said, suddenly assertive.
Kaede walked behind me and gently pushed me down by the shoulders.
"You," she whispered, "are the gift now."
I sat stiffly, every neuron on fire.
Four beautiful, powerful, chaotic women stood around me.
And somewhere in the room, Alva whispered,
"Happy birthday, darling. This simulation is now... active."