You little brat, I raised you, and now you bring him here.
Explain to me—what the hell is this thing called a surprise?
I mean it. Explain to me—what the actual hell is a so-called surprise!
You brought Golden Sparkles here?!
Sanjiro's smile was as bright as the sun, but deep inside, he was screaming obscenities.
This is messed up beyond belief.
He'd been avoiding Goldie the past few days, and yet the guy still came knocking. And it was the brat who led him straight through the front door.
My pants moved.
I'm out. I'm done with this.
A chill ran down Sanjiro's spine.
If it weren't for the Chains of Heaven wrapped around his waist giving him a subtle nudge, he wouldn't have realized who this guest really was.
If Goldie had come with heartfelt words to reunite with his "dear friend," Sanjiro would've been instantly obliterated on the spot!
Putting on a perfect smile that showed white teeth, he said, "Dinner's ready, Mr. Gold. Please wash up and eat."
As for that original plan to beat him up and toss him into the Fuyuki Bay?
Yeah, right. If he didn't get tossed into the bay himself, that was already a miracle!
"Thanks for having me."
Gilgamesh walked in with perfect poise.
And he naturally changed into indoor slippers, showing zero regard for being "a guest."
During that handshake earlier, when he fully activated Sha Naqba Imuru, he sensed some kind of mysterious aura.
Interesting. Incredibly interesting.
Gilgamesh's lips curled into a small smile. Just as he expected.
Outwardly, Sanjiro looked like just another wholesome stay-at-home man.
But Gil still picked up something... different.
Someone who lives with a little girl wrapped in countless seals like she's some world-ending demon?
Could that person really be "ordinary"?
Obviously not.
"Ordinary" is the most suspicious thing of all.
Once Gil went to the washroom—Kirina leaned in next to Sanjiro,
"Hehe, that guy's basically a walking pile of gold. Like, literally owns a mine!"
This was the first time she realized what obscene wealth actually looked like.
He didn't even care about money. Just spent it on a whim.
Even just coming over for a regular home-cooked meal, he casually dropped tens of thousands in cash.
Is this guy the rich village idiot or what?!
"Yeah… he's got money alright." Sanjiro yanked the brat's ear. "Didn't I tell you not to bring strangers into the house?!"
Do you even realize who you just brought home?
I raised you with blood, sweat, and tears, and this is how you repay me?
Absolute betrayal!
And you—! Didn't this guy stab you straight in the heart in a past life?! You're not even afraid he'll do it again?
(Guess~)
"Ahem, I know, I know. But I just wanted to lighten your load, okay?"
Kirina gave a sheepish cough.
Yeah, she knew she was in the wrong.
Playing tour guide for a total stranger, and even bringing him home under the temptation of cash… anyone would say she was out of line.
But!
He gave too much!!!
So much that she couldn't even bring herself to say no.
Gritting her teeth, Kirina pulled out half the cash from her tiny wallet and handed it to him:"Here. Let's split it fifty-fifty. Consider it your chef's fee."
But—
Sanjiro casually reached into her clothes and pulled out another wallet.
"Hand it over."
Under her gritted-teeth glare, he calmly tucked it into his shirt pocket.
Brat, you're still too green to play games with me.
I know everything about you, down to every hair on your head.
"No fair! You're robbing me blind!"
Kirina whispered, trying not to shout.
But in her heart, she was cheering. Looks like she dodged a beating this time. Most importantly—you never expected I had a third wallet, hidden somewhere else!
Click—
The bathroom door opened, and Gilgamesh stepped out, looking intrigued,
"You two have such a great relationship."
These two were just weird.
They acted more like bickering siblings than "guard" and "prisoner."
All this back-and-forth over a few measly bucks that he tossed at them without a second thought?
Fascinating. Utterly fascinating.
(Poor, how ridiculously poor.)
Gil looked over the ordinary dishes on the table but didn't care in the slightest.
As someone who holds the Gate of Babylon, standing atop the human pyramid of wealth, he could eat anything he desired.
"Please, Mr. Gold, have a seat! Let's eat!" Kirina sucked up eagerly.
Take someone's money, and they'll take your food. That's how it works.
"Thank you."
Gil casually took a seat.
He would never be bothered by simple home cooking. He just wanted to observe the man behind the little girl.
Very "locally adapted," he picked up some chopsticks and grabbed a bite to play along.
"Hm???"
He suddenly froze.
A burst of incredible flavor exploded in his mouth.
It was delicious.
Even he couldn't deny it.
Skill bordering on divinity.
Why… why did this taste trigger such nostalgia?
Kirina beamed, "How is it? Amazing, right? Doesn't lose to any five-star chef!"
She'd been to some high-end parties before—those dishes couldn't even compare to what Sanjiro made.
She'd tried to convince him to open a restaurant, but he refused.
This shut-in had the gall to say, "Ordinary people aren't worthy of my food." That if he did open a place, people would line up around the stadium.
Some would even go to war just to taste his cooking.
Is this guy delusional?
Even real fox spirits weren't that seductive!
"It is indeed very good." Gil nodded. "I'm starting to envy you a little, getting to eat this every day."
"If you like it, come by anytime! Don't be shy, treat this as your home!" Kirina rubbed her hands together eagerly.
This guy was a walking goldmine.
If she could become his little "sister," she'd go from average to filthy rich overnight!
Smack—
Sanjiro flicked her forehead.
"Quit yapping. Mr. Gold is just curious about home cooking."
Brat, are you trying to kill me?!
It's already a miracle he hasn't noticed anything. And now you're inviting him to come over regularly?!
Guess I'll need to whip out the Chains of Heaven and teach you a lesson.
...After he leaves.
"Oh no, don't worry. I'll stop by when I can."
Gil smiled.
That little girl earlier… the aura she accidentally leaked, the endless seals on her body…
Sitting next to her was like having dinner on top of a live nuclear bomb, one set to explode at any moment.
Anyone else would be paralyzed.
Only he could remain calm and still eat.
"Don't be shy! I feel like we're family already!"
Kirina sweet-talked like honey.
Not even lying. Seeing him was like seeing Benjamin Franklin from the banknotes.
"..."
Sanjiro's forehead twitched with veins.
Brat, you've lost all dignity.
A world-ending calamity like you, groveling for some money?
Just for a few grand?
"Adorable little thing. I have a friend just like you." Gil smiled fondly.
Been a long time since he saw that green-haired friend of his.
Was he still with Nameless?
"Ohhh, is your friend—"
"Don't pry!" Sanjiro immediately clamped a hand over her mouth.
En-chan was literally his belt right now.
It was Enkidu who warned him earlier—letting him realize Gil's true identity.
After all, the Chains of Heaven were created specifically to counter the King of Heroes!
If Gil caught on, he'd be found out instantly.
"Thanks for the meal. I should get going."
Gil wiped his mouth and stood up.
"Eh? Leaving already? You barely ate!" Kirina felt a little guilty.
The guy paid thousands and only had a few bites. Even if you're scamming, don't be this blatant!
"It's fine. I just came for a look."
He waved it off, utterly unconcerned.
Both rushed to see him out—
But just as they stood up—
Ding-dong!
The doorbell rang.
"Coming~"
Kirina ran to open the door.
Sanjiro's relaxed expression suddenly froze.
He just remembered something important—
Illya said she was coming for dinner!!!
Shit!
He'd been so preoccupied with recognizing Gil, he completely forgot.
Click—
The door opened, and a silver-haired loli beamed sweetly,
"Sanjiro, sorry I'm a little late."
"Not at all, we're just eating now." Kirina called cheerfully.
But then noticed something weird—both men in the room froze.
Huh? What's going on?
Could it be that Mr. Gold was also an Illya fan?
Kirina could understand that.
Ever since Unlimited Blade Works aired, she'd gained tons of fans.
Everyone called her the "Pure White Angel."
So Gil's surprise made sense—but why did Sanjiro look like he wanted to flee the scene?
Something's up!
Ahem—
Sanjiro casually stepped in to block Gil.
"Illya, wash your hands first. Dinner's ready."
"Okay."
Illya nodded and walked past Gilgamesh.
Sanjiro's heart nearly leapt out of his throat.
Don't forget—in Unlimited Blade Works, Gil really wanted to say something heartfelt to Illya.
Thankfully, this Gil didn't move. He just smiled as she passed.
"Didn't expect Illya to be here too. Looks like I really should come by more often."
How fascinating. Utterly fascinating.
Even Illya was here.
This humble little house hid tigers and dragons.
He wasn't here for heartfelt words—he wasn't some cringey teenager anymore. He already had endless treasure. Who cared about some dumb cup?
Sanjiro instinctively wanted to say no.
No!
Please don't come back again!
God help us all if you and Illya are in the same room often!
"You're welcome anytime!"
Kirina beamed.
"Can I call you 'big bro,' Mr. Gold?"
This was a big, big thigh to cling to.
"Of course." Gil smiled.
Given her weird identity, no Heroic Spirit could afford to ignore her. If word got out, every Heroic Spirit in the world would come running!
Just then—
The sleeping Fou finally woke up.
Stretching with feline elegance, he walked into the living room:
"Fou… fou…" (Dinner time!)
As he padded forward—
Gilgamesh's crimson eyes locked onto him.
He cranked up Sha Naqba Imuru, yet all he sensed was some vague mysterious aura.
He couldn't see through him at all.
Just like the loli girl.
This was a… cat???
Fou tilted his head under the gaze,
"Meow?"
He had his Cognitive Filter on—no one could perceive his true form.
To them, he was just an ordinary cat.
Sure, this Heroic Spirit might've noticed something—
But so what?
As the Beast IV, bearer of the sin of [Comparison], he would always be just a bit stronger.
Lottery? You win second prize. He wins first.
Dice? You roll a 5. He rolls a 6.
And so on.
Always just a little better.
Frustrating, isn't it?
Fou strutted past Gil, jumped into his designated spot, and started munching on dried fish.
Stupid humans. Don't delay my meal.
Kirina introduced proudly,
"This is my cat, Fou. Isn't he super cute?"
Cute, yeah.
But this damn cat never lets her pet him!
Kirina gritted her teeth with frustration, while Fou kept snuggling up to Sanjiro.
Kirina was fuming inside, gritting her teeth with frustration—only able to watch as Fou cozied up affectionately to Sanjiro.
She was increasingly convinced:
This cat was definitely a seductive fox spirit from Sanjiro's past life, reincarnated into a cat to repay his karmic debt!
"He really is quite cute."
Gilgamesh nodded in agreement.
That little white beast Merlin tossed down from the Tower of the End… actually had a disguise even he couldn't see through?
Just what is this creature?
Merlin, that nightmare-inducing bastard, was clearly hiding a lot from him.
Once I'm done watching this grand performance, you better pray you don't cross me again.
Gilgamesh chuckled lightly,
"Then I'll take my leave for now."
"Huh? Want me to walk you out?" Kirina offered.
"No need. You enjoy your dinner—I'll have Sanjiro walk me out."
Waving his hand casually, Gilgamesh brushed her off.
Under the reluctant gaze of the little money-grubber, he stepped out the door with Sanjiro.
The two walked side by side through the nighttime streets of Fuyuki City.
One tall, one short—but equally good-looking.
Their presence drew quite a few glances from passing schoolgirls.
As they reached the square near the apartment complex—
Gilgamesh suddenly stopped, placed a hand on Sanjiro's shoulder, and smiled,
"My dear friend—so you're the one going around calling yourself Sanjiro?!"