Ari could understand English, so she knew it was Cohen who'd shown up. But she stood there like she'd been petrified, too scared to even turn her head.
Who could blame her? She and Cohen were bound by an unbreakable oath, after all…
"Is Ari the name of this black unicorn?" the old man asked Cohen. "Hey there, kid. I'm Bernhard Xavier. Back in my younger days, I worked at a brewery in Hogsmeade. When I got older, I didn't stick around, but never in my life did I imagine unicorns would come looking for me to help them brew alcohol. How old are you? Here to play with the unicorns?"
"Yeah, totally," Cohen said. "I'm here to hang out with the unicorns. Name's Cohen, twelve years old. They taught us at school that unicorns love kids the most—grown-ups usually can't even get close to them, right?"
Every word Cohen said was a jab at these principle-ditching unicorns.
What happened to being wary of humans? What happened to only liking little girls?
Pfft! They'd do anything for a drink!
This old guy Xavier was a "little girl" now? Saying he was Professor X controlling them with mind powers would be more believable than this nonsense!
[*We can explain—*] the unicorn leader hurriedly chimed in. [*We're just having a little sip, just a little…*]
[*That one next to you is passed out belly-up,*] Cohen shot back, glancing at the unicorn who'd been chugging away just moments ago, ruthlessly exposing the leader's lie.
"I thought unicorns were supposed to be super cautious around wizards," Xavier said, nodding his gray head eagerly as he launched into a story for Cohen. "But get this—last month, I was taking a walk near Hogsmeade, and out of nowhere, I saw two unicorns, one black and one white. Guess what happened next?"
"They wrote English with their hooves in the mud!" Xavier said, still amazed. "I'd never seen a unicorn write before. They wanted me to find someone who could brew alcohol—and wouldn't you know it, I used to be a brewer myself."
"So these walls, the wheat fields, the grapevines, the barrels—all that was your doing for them?" Cohen asked, feigning curiosity to fish for more details.
"Well, the two little farm patches and the barrels, yeah, that was me. The magical hedge, though? That just popped up out of nowhere. I reckon it's unicorn magic," Xavier said, stroking his beard. "Same deal with how fast these crops grow. Kid, did you know unicorns can ripen stuff way quicker than any spell or potion we've got? Fastest I've seen, those grapes ripened three times in one day! You can tell they're *really* into their booze. Last time, a few of them even insisted on giving me some of their tail hair…"
[*Maybe say a little less…*]
Ari nervously pawed at the dirt with her hoof.
But Xavier couldn't hear the unicorns, so he just kept happily spilling every detail to Cohen.
"Then they told me they wanted to wake up with booze ready to go—no one's ever said unicorns like drinking before! So I came up with a plan. Check this out…" Xavier grabbed Cohen and started showing off his setup.
A "booze canal" circling the unicorns' sleeping spot, so when they woke up from a drunken stupor, they could just slurp away again.
"Who could say no to a unicorn's request, right?" Xavier said.
"You're a genius," Cohen nodded. "So, you planning to tell people about the unicorns liking alcohol?"
"Oh, a story this good? I've gotta brag about it at the Three Broomsticks," Xavier chuckled. "Next time I'm at the pub, I bet Darren and Mark—old coworkers of mine—won't believe a word of it…"
"Next time? So you haven't told anyone yet?" Cohen asked.
"Nah, I've been too busy setting up this little brewery. Barely made it to the pub lately… Why're you suddenly—?"
"*Obliviate.*" Cohen quietly cast a Memory Charm on the old man. The unicorns being naive was one thing, but this guy too?
If word got out that unicorns loved booze, the Forbidden Forest would be crawling with poachers in no time.
After dropping the dazed Xavier off at the Hogwarts grounds, Cohen returned to the unicorns' fenced-in area.
"Nice work, huh? No one to buy you drinks, so you just find some guy to brew for you?" Cohen said to the silent herd. "You lot are bloody brilliant, aren't you?"
[*It's not like one unicorn could come up with such a great idea…*] The unicorn leader, thinking Cohen was praising them, relaxed a bit and humbly added, [*It was really thanks to Ari…*]
[*Shut up!*] Ari couldn't bear to watch this clueless leader spill everything to their own kind.
[*Okay, so… it wasn't Ari's idea?*]
The unicorn leader backtracked.
"That wizard almost blabbed about you drinking yourselves into a coma every day!" Cohen said, exasperated. "Can't you have *some* sense of danger? Do you even know what other wizards would do if they found out?"
[*What would they do?*]
"They'd come in droves to hunt you down! You know how much unicorn hair and blood are worth to wizards? Did you already forget what happened two years ago?!" Cohen scolded. "Or what, you think…"
[*It's… not that bad, right?*] the leader said. [*We've got Ari now. She could take down a bunch of wizards without breaking a sweat…*]
"Stop counting on Ari to protect you. I'm taking her with me," Cohen dropped the bombshell. "She can't stay here with you for too long."
[*Why not?!*] the unicorns chorused.
[*Without Ari, how are we supposed to drag wizards here to brew for us…*] a young unicorn said sadly.
[*Yeah, I'll die without booze…*]
[*How are we supposed to live without Ari…*]
[*See? They can't manage without me,*] Ari said to Cohen. [*They can't help themselves, and they need my protection…*]
[*Who could say no to a unicorn's request, right?*] the leader pleaded with Cohen too.
"Another unicorn could, for one," Cohen said firmly. "You lot can drink all you want, but Ari can't."
[*Why not?!*] Ari snapped back, annoyed. [*You're worrying over nothing. I'm not gonna explode from drinking too much! I've been at it for a month already!*]
"And what do you think's flowing through your veins right now?" Cohen countered.
[*Liquid curses?*] Ari guessed.
"It's frickin' alcohol and sugar!" Cohen roared, grabbing Ari and slicing a small cut on her back with his wand.
Black cursed blood oozed out. Unlike Cohen's less pure liquid curse, which evaporated in the air, Ari's was more… well, liquid.
[*Hiss…*] A few unicorns in the herd winced audibly, like it hurt just to watch.
Cohen quickly sealed the wound after taking a small sample, then levitated the blob of cursed blood into the air with a charm. He pointed his wand at it.
"Wanna see what happens when your blood meets fire?" Cohen said menacingly. "*Incendio!*"
A jet of flame hit the blob of Ari's blood. What was supposed to be unburnable ignited in an instant, sparking gasps of shock from the unicorns.
(End of Chapter)